Moonah Ellison, Publisher of New York Moves: Hi Bellamy, how are you?
Bellamy Young: I’m so good, how are you?
M: I’m good, I’m good. First of all I’d like to say congratulations in accepting our nomination as a Power Woman this year.
B: So honored, really and truly thank you so much and thank you just for having the conversation. It matters that this conversation is had widely and loudly.
M: Absolutely, absolutely. 100%. I’m so excited to hear about all of your amazing projects that you’ve got going on as well.
B: Oh yeah, I know it’s a blessed time I feel super lucky. Wait are you here with me in New York or are you in LA?
M: I’m in New York, right now.
B: Yeah okay, okay good. All right yeah I mean I’ve been wanting to come back to New York for forever so to get to come back to New York on such an incredible project with such wonderful people it’s dreamy.
M: Yeah fantastic. That’s awesome. And you couldn’t think of a better place to be during the summer as well.
B: No, or the Fall or the Winter or the Spring. I mean New York’s the best.
M: Once you’ve been to New York though everything becomes challenging because you compare everything and it just becomes a nightmare.
B: I know, I know. I was here for ten years after college and then literally I’ve just been…So I’m just so happy to be back.
M: Oh that’s fantastic. Are you a New York chick just by nature or…?
B: I think that’s a little too…I wouldn’t…I don’t know that New York would claim me, but I know that like it’s my heart’s home like I make the most sense to myself here, I feel better here, ya know, I just feel grounded, oriented, yeah I really do it is my heart’s home. When I left North Carolina I went to college in New Haven and then I came down here and this was the first time I was like “oh, everything makes sense now okay, okay”. Where are you? Did you grow up here?
M: No, in the UK, but I’ve been out here almost 25 years now and you’re absolutely right you know the editor has a saying he says that you know New Yorkers are built all around the world they just have to find themselves. Yeah, you know? And it’s the truth because when you come here you actually do fit in or you don’t. You know we play games with some of the students in the office sometimes and say, “Okay we give this one 6 months, she’s gonna get withdrawal symptoms and go home.
B: But it’s true, it does. I mean that’s what your editor is so…has expressed something I could never have expressed. It’s really the truth, you’re here or you’re out, you know?
M: Yeah that’s right. It either works or it doesn’t. Well I’m really excited I know we’ve got some really interesting questions to pose to yourself. I hope you had a chance to at least have the paperwork in front of you.
B: I just got home from work so I just scanned through them so I won’t purport to have deep thoughts…
M: That’s fine.
B: …but I have a general sense of where we’re going.
M: Fantastic. That’s great and honestly we tend to not really share them, but I know that in the past we have had our honorees kind of say oh I wish I had had these it would have given me more chance to think about them and, you know, they are very, very thought-provoking and they are very in the moment and
there’s not a wrong answer to any of them because everybody has an opinion and again we created this formula because we were tired, and you said it when we opened up the conversation, you know not enough questions are posed to women that are less about dumbing down and more about, you know, I have a mind, I want to use it and, you know, thank you very much for allowing me to have an opinion, you know? And anything you don’t want to answer it’s absolutely fine we can just step on to the next one.
B: Okay.
M: Okay cool, okay so let’s begin with the first question. In your opinion what qualities make for a Power Woman?
B: You know, I…when I see a woman in her power what I am always most struck by is that I see a person who is so comfortable in her confidence, intellect, abilities, situations that she is able to bring everyone up with her and there’s a grace that transcends competitiveness that comes with true power and that’s what I’m always drawn to and appreciate in others and aspire to in myself.
M: That’s a good answer. Moving on to question 2, with all the different issues that we focus on in our lives to have a balance…to stay balanced what in your efforts…or how do you pursue your efforts in gender equality? And do you feel
that these are kind of a more of a global approach or specific issues that you might be passionate about?
B: I think right now, we are in triage mode…what’s the right way to say this? I think that the world zagged in a way that as a child I sort of thought progress was only one direction and in the last few years the world has zagged in a way that was so surprising to me personally and for me upsetting, but I think it has…you know the silver lining in it a little bit is it has mobilized legions of people who now, at least in America, no longer take certain freedoms and inclusions for granted and so I think for me, every day has become about do what you can. If today what you can do is contribute money, that’s great. If today you can march, go march. If today is the day you can get on a plane and volunteer somewhere internationally then how wonderful, but I see everyone doing what they can in the moment cuz we know that every day is precious and a new chance, but every day is dire there are so many needs that it is simply a matter of being engaged…so, um…I know I was so lucky I got to go…I’m an ambassador for CARE, the organization CARE this year and I got to go on a trip with them to Rwanda in
January and what a blessing of an opportunity and what an incredible organization and they’re in 94 countries all over the globe and it’s hard to thumbnail them because they do very nuanced response in each situation and in Rwanda we spent a lot of time in a Safe School for Girls, but also in a village savings and loan outgrowth that a woman named Bridget who had had to five years ago beg her husband for money for soap, now she owns a vegetable farm, she has 850 chickens and gets 1,000 eggs a day, she has employees. So, to go and see things like that where people are hands on and it’s just…teach a man to fish, you know, it’s not charity in that here’s 4 dollars, it’s charity in that here’s the infrastructure we’re supporting your dream let’s figure out how to make this work. So, that’s incredible and then some days you get to go like…go march with the women’s march and then some days you’re working so you can only send money, but I just feel like I see so many more of my friends just doing whatever they can every day and the aggregate is gonna make like an avalanche of good.
M: Yeah, absolutely, absolutely and it’s time already, right? I mean I think women today are far less intimidated and threatened and are much more, “Hang on, hold it, I have an opinion, it counts.”
B: Yeah, exactly.
M: Just on an equal footing, it’s not as if we’re asking for anything outside of the ordinary, which is the most bizarre part of the conversation, you know?
B: What’s most important is supporting each other. I think about the way the medical model is just starting to move away from male body centered and how many friends have had issues over the last 3 years and like “oh we just found out
that you know this is different…” Of course it’s different in women, you know, like it’s been such a male-modeled world and now we’re starting to shake free of that and women supporting women is the way we’re all gonna get brought up to a balance.
M: Totally, totally and I have to say that what’s really refreshing about it all is that…you do feel it. That sort of…the energy that, you know, that you talk about like in New York City, you actually feel the difference in…a woman won’t turn
around and respond with “no I’m not gonna help you” or “no I’m not gonna do anything” she actually will offer a reaching hand and go “yeah come on I’ve got your back, you’re all right.”
B: Yeah we don’t think there’s only one seat at the table anymore, exactly. M: Yeah, yeah absolutely. Such a great feeling though.
B: Yas!
M: Moving on to question 3, which is interesting, because you kind of touched on the climate a little bit about, you know, how the climate debate is such a big deal. Do you have an opinion in that space? I mean do you feel that women should be playing a specific role in climate change today?
B: Oh my goodness. Well first, I would just take issue, like semantically, with the word debate because it’s science and it’s happening and it’s true like climate change is a truth not something to be talked about anymore, it’s something that should be acted on and in terms of a gender specific role for women…I mean of course when you…you can’t mention gender and climate without thinking of Greta Thunberg because she has been such an inspiration this, you know, in the last year and a half when her voice has been so angelically spearing…um…but I can’t think for me that climate is gendered because it’s gonna…I mean it effects all of us and all at once and everywhere so only that I celebrate that women are finding, you know, finding and using their voices and taking their space in the room as they should be because we have so much to contribute, but shy of that…and I definitely do think, I will say with an asterisk, I will say that we do bring a different perspective so it is encumbered upon us to use our voices, take our space and sit at the table, but besides that I do believe it to be a human issue not a gendered issue.
M: Right, yeah. Good point, that’s actually very well observed for an answer because it is true, it is a human issue, you don’t have to be any specific gender to realize that there’s something wrong and something is genuinely going to effect the world going forward, you know?
B: And I do think often we bring, we steer the conversation more comfortably into an emotional territory, but there’s no one who doesn’t feel emotional about, you know, our children not having a planet, you know, so yeah I do, I just believe it’s an issue for all of us.
M: Yeah fantastic. Great answer again, thank you for sharing that and thank you for actually having an opinion on it, you know?
B: Oh well, you know, I feel like we gotta, we have to show up.
M: Yeah, touche.
B: I also am not a person like I’m not a person that ever minds being wrong I just want us all to be engaged in conversation so I will tell you how I’m feeling and thinking and what I’ve read and what I’ve, you know, processed in my own heart but I’m so happy for everyone else at the table to bring me their information too. I want to be moved, I want to be changed, I want to have the highest possibility of knowledge and I want us all to work as a group, you know, I’m never pragmatic, but I’m happy to offer my thoughts.
M: It’s a great approach to take because at the end of the day you only learn by sharing, right?
B: Yeah and I think it empowers others to give their truth too, you know, if you give yours…cuz people, we’re animals at the end of the day you can feel if someone’s holding back or you know hedging or being political so I feel like there’s a freedom in truth.
M: Yeah I agree, I agree. So moving on to a lighter question, if you could have someone else’s job for the day, who and what would that be?
B: Okay, first of all…um…I will put the enormous caveat of saying…um…I would never like there’s sort of an inherent megalomania in taking someone else’s job and I would never (undistinguishable), but if I…so I will frame it like if I could give all my energy to someone who is living a life I think deserves it for a day it would be Ava Duvernay, I would give Ava absolutely all of my energy and light and I just think that she is walking the walk with such grace and courage and giving her truth and telling the important stories and bringing people to the table and getting other people’s stories out there with the distribution arm of her…hmm I don’t know what the right…I’ll say corporation, but I don’t know that that’s the right way to say it, but yeah Ava can have all my energy for at least a day to go and do good.
M: Haha, nice. Fantastic. Good answer. So question 6, I’m gonna get you to switch out a little bit in that…what historical figure do you most identify with?
B: Yeah, this is…when I scanned through the questions this was the hardest for me…
M: Yes, yeah I agree.
B: Yeah it was, just because I…and maybe this is, maybe we do like peak behind the curtain of my own like pockets of low self-esteem that linger, but I can’t imagine…you know I…you think of historical figures and you don’t think of people living normal lives. You think of Ghandi or you think of like…so I again would…I demur from claiming that I am, you know, in any way like anyone great, but I’ll tell you whom I think of and admire like if I could ever in even a small way inspire like Martin Luther King (Jr.) or I could like be honest like
James Baldwin or, you know, Michelle Obama still ranks for me as a person who is just doing life right on every level. I’d be super proud if elements of any of them I could radiate forth as I walk around this planet and this life.
M: Fantastic. Nice broad answer, nice safe answer.
B: You know, well that’s the thing I just don’t…I can be like I’m Cleopatra, you know like what am I gonna say? I don’t know.
M: I agree, I agree 100%. It was a tough one. Everyone has been struggling with it. B: It’s hard.
M: It’s just like how and where do you position it, right? But that being said…
B: Yeah, yeah. I mean it really made me think I…that’s the one I was like…I probably haven’t read through to the end of the questions because I was like “oh shit, what am I gonna say?”
M: No, don’t even worry about it. It’s all good, it’s all good. It’s…at the end of the day it’s like you say, you know, they’re all talking points and it’s all about, you know, in the moment what lands, you know, we ask the question and wherever your head goes in that moment, right? But moving on to the next question, and I’m gonna read this because it’s kind of interesting and I’d like to get your perspective on it, why or why not, it begins, in what way do you work for women’s power and equality and what do you think is the number one action we as a society can take like an affirmative action to make change possible?
B: For me, short term, right now boots on the ground. That’s the answer to that is women running for office.
M: Nice one.
B: I think (indistinguishable) in America at least you know from American’s perspective representation matters and I know my industry…we’re trying to you
know baby steps forward in terms of having everyone’s story, but the people who make the laws are the people who really impact daily life and that’s not necessarily even presidential level that’s your, you know, town councilors, your school board members, it’s very local level people and of course, of course, of course, going up abortion is such a dire topic right now, but I think getting women in office is going to change so much and I see a wonderful ground swell in that direction and I also see a wonderful synergy around not just women supporting women, but people supporting women and so that’s really a big focus for me now, like I like…I wanna support everyone, I wanna see everybody get out and run and I wanna see more women in office making decisions that hold…we’re just a little bit better, God bless, and I hope this will change too, but we’re a little bit better at holding everyone’s concerns in our hands, you know? So, I look forward to more women in office.
M: Yeah, I like it. I like where your head is and that’s a really excellent answer because it’s true you know? It’s all about women helping to influence the voice, right?
B: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
M: The total voice at the end of the day, you know, we are…
B: But also just like I think about…oh, yeah go ahead.
M: No, no, go head you were about to say you were thinking about…
B: I was about to say I think about the…like last week, you know, God it was probably John Oliver, Trevor Noah or something, but watching a video they were showing about a woman…an incarcerated woman having to beg for money from a prison council to get tampons, right, she gets like two dollars an hour at her job, extra tampons cost you know like 4 dollars or she can see a doctor, so basically her whole month’s salary to get a special (indistinguishable) to get extra hygiene products, but she was having to say all of this to a man that was not even comfortable with the word, you know, much less with her situation and I just think there are real dire human moments happening that a woman in a place of judgment, power, decision making would make life a lot more humane.
M: Right, absolutely and I think…and also just that understanding I think…and I’m gonna be the first to also defend men as much as I know that, you know, I represent a woman’s magazine, but I am a believer that, you know, we need to bring our men up to speed as well, I think sometimes women isolate men for all the wrong reasons and men are not by nature they’re just a human being that is just like, okay whatever if you’ve got this, it’s fine, instead of saying come on, get up, we’re gonna do this together, you know?
B: You’re…that’s true, that’s very true.
M: Which I think is relevant, I think too many times we kind of let it go and then you know, we’re the first to kind of say no you shouldn’t, you should be doing it all together so that it makes it all worthwhile, but moving on to our next question, which is really interesting in your industry in that, you know, there’s been a lot of movement and kind of a space where we talk about what’s equal for equal pay, equal opportunities, do you feel that there’s ever been a time or a window where you’ve had to kind of deal with that situation? The question specifically talks about, you know, have you ever encountered a block in a workplace where you’ve had to turn around and figure out what do I do?
B: Oh wait, for pay or for…?
M: Yeah, in this instance related to equal pay.
B: Yes, I…of course. We renegotiated Scandal as a group and…yeah it was very clearly women made far, far less than all of the men and it was…it was, you know, obviously without any specifics…I think we were all surprised by the truth of it. You know, we know we’re privileged because we’re so lucky to have fancy jobs anyway, so I think we thought we were insulated, but we weren’t and…but what was beautiful and to tag on what you’re saying about, you know, loving men and having a conversation and that they’re being wonderful men that are already having the conversation, the guys that we were in it with…I mean we were a real family and we just sat down and threw spaghetti at the wall until we could figure out an algorithm that respected everyone equally and it took us from, you know, August to December. It took a long time, but we did it and it’s doable, but I think the most important thing is sharing knowledge, you know, having the conversation. Talking is everything, being honest and open, leaving space to go away and think things through and process come back together with ideas, everybody’s ideas are respected and then eventually when there’s love in your heart you wind up at the most just answer. Yeah, when everybody’s in it.
M: That’s fantastic. That’s a great answer, I’m glad that I asked that the way…I didn’t ask that the way it was worded because I think it was to try and get your perspective and your view, but that’s so…and it’s so refreshing that it’s happening now, you know, it’s never too late to actually have that conversation that dialogue.
B: No, no, no, yeah and always just knowing, you know, and maybe it doesn’t always turn out right, but always hoping that it will and leaving space for it to and it takes it’s own time, but…you know yeah, yeah.
M: Fantastic so…and moving on to the next question where it talks about the landscape of the political…how the landscape in the political hemisphere is kind of changing, do you feel that there has been an impact today and I think you kind of touched on it a little bit in that, you know, yes, Hillary didn’t become our president, unfortunately, but from the very fact that she was up there and, you know, the intention was that, yes, we may have or we could have had a female president as a Western society that would have been absolutely amazing…
B: And we will, and we will one day.
M: I agree, absolutely, absolutely.
B: And our blue wave has a beautiful array of humanity in it, female and male, and that was important but we just have to keep that going, you know, we have to just sort of shake things loose from the way things have looked in America and our history and keep them, you know, getting current with the way America looks now and because that’s what…we’re supposed to be a representational system so we have to be represented and we have to see ourselves…this has been a great race also for…you can’t…you know they always say oh dream big, but you can’t dream what you can’t see, you know, some people don’t even know they can have dreams and so to have a man who is out and gay run, to have a black woman running, to have a black man running like there have been some very important milestones this year in terms of just opening peoples’ hearts to dreams and that’s what gives me hope for the future. So, yeah, I did, I did 8 states, I campaigned for Hillary in 8 states and it was so interesting how gendered that was and she is a bit of a unicorn in so many ways so that’s a sort of a whole other conversation, but I am happy to have so many other women to talk about this year and for there to be so many women that we’re just talking about the issues, we don’t have to think about gender now. I want it to become just absolutely, you know, the norm that women run and then we can just focus on how candidates feel and what candidates are going to do.
M: Right, absolutely. Great, fantastic I love…I think I’m just enjoying the fact that you come from the entertainment space and you get it, you know, and I don’t know why I say that like that I think because again we tend to kind of think people are cocooned and in their bubble and don’t really see what’s going on outside there, but it is so refreshing to hear you kind of be so actively involved in so much both on the philanthropy side and also the political side and also, you know, appreciating that women all need a helping hand in everything that we do.
B: Well it’s wonderful to have this conversation I never get asked questions like these so it’s a delight.
M: Fantastic, so I’m gonna take it back down to Earth just for a second and ask you a question that kind of is about your career and your path, do you feel that there was a defining moment or experience in your life that led you to where you are today and can you tell me what that is?
B: I…for me…yes, it’s a bit of a nebulus not so much like, you know, I saw this and this changed, but singing. It was singing…I, you know, from the time I was 5 or something I’ve been singing and just knowing that I could live other lifetimes in this lifetime like even if they were just three minutes long in a song, but it was like an instant addiction or salvation or haven or however you wanna coin it. It saved me it really, really did and so I just knew very, very early that I needed it. Yeah, that’s the right way to say it, I needed it and I’ve been so lucky because I have so many friends that are of equal or surpassing talent that, you know, maybe have not gotten to be actors in this lifetime so I feel lucky every day that I get to do what I do because I love it so much, but it’s just like you just exercise your empathy like all day every day it’s such a privilege, it’s the best.
M: Fantastic. Great, that’s really, really great to hear that you got to stick with your passion and it actually turned into your career.
B: Yeah, yeah, I feel lucky.
M: So if you could take the conversation to another level and share with us if there was one piece of advice that was given to you what would…let me rephrase that question what is the best piece of advice that’s ever been given to you?
B: Wow it’s so good that these follow each other because seriously they’re like oppositional or…or well…it’s a hair split…um my…wow my sweet mother has buried four husbands and her third husband, I loved him so much, his name was Barry and he used to always say, he was from Brockton, Massachusetts, he was like “Just be yourself and you’ll be fine.” And I literally couldn’t hear that for, I mean he’d been dead ten years before I could hear that, I was so not wanting to be myself ever, anywhere at anytime, but it has come to be a lifeline because it’s never wrong. You’re never wrong if you give your truth and it always just opens other peoples’ hearts even if they disagree with you they can sense your honesty and…so it’s wound up being the best thing anyone ever told me, the whole secret to life…
M: …is just be true, yeah, be true to yourself.
B: Yeah, you just be yourself and you’ll be fine.
M: Yeah. Oh that’s fantastic what a lovely sentiment that was.
B: I know, it’s so simple, I was like “uh I think you’re
wrong…(undistinguishable)…I’m sure you’re wrong about that…”
M: It’s like all things, right? Age and time teaches us very different messages. It’s the truth.
B: Yeah.
M: So moving on to the next question because I’ve got a few more to have your… B: Yeah, get in there.
M: There are many studies that support the idea of a female presence in the boardroom increases the bottom line and leads to healthier work environments. What can we do to continue to support and enhance the growth and presence of women in high profile positions? Thoughts?
B: Yeah, we…we fill the pipeline. We get the pipeline full, we keep women, girls in, you know, we keep girls in school. We keep listening and feeding girls dreams, we, you know, let them know that everything is possible because that’s all it is right now we’re just having to get the applicant pool more full because, you know, life has self-selected women out of some sectors too early and unfairly. So, now that we’re aware of it we just have to fill the whole pond full of beautiful, wise, wonderful female voices and then I…I really do feel like it’s self-winding from there like women…once you give women their power then they can run with it.
M: Right, right, absolutely. And there’s something to be said for that, whichever way you look at it and whatever industry you’re in as well, I mean your industry is so empowered right now, you know, looking at ways on how women are collaborating so well and it just works, right?
B: Well thinking about…like going back to Ava, she’s introduced so many female directors on Queen Sugar, you know, she makes a point to have, you know, a crew of color and female directors and, you know, just to include humans who have been left at the periphery for absolutely unjust causes cuz their talent is enormous and so it’s love- oh Shondaland, to live in a matriarchy for 7 years, it was a delight there’s that consciousness of inclusivity that is not happening because it’s never, you know, white man has never had to be conscious of that before. Times have changed, but definitely a woman who has come up that far, knows how hard it was to get there and so is aware of bringing other women up with her or bringing other humans up with her so, it’s um…yeah it’s…we’re living in a good time in that way.
M: Yeah, fantastic. Now, the next question’s kind of interesting because it talks a little bit about something, again, you’ve touched on earlier, you support a charity called CARE, I think you said it was?
B: Yeah.
M: It’s called CARE and education…we all know how important education is to everything that we do. Education, education, education, it’s like people talk about real estate, you know, if your real estate is…(indistinguishable)…location, location, location, right? Right? Then you’ve got a good deal going. And we talk about this and we are very almost flippant about the fact that it’s one of the top three responsibilities of civilized society and Obama used to talk about it all the time, you know if people are educated they can make informed decisions, if you make informed decisions you have a better life, but why is it, then this question continues to say, that if so why is it so prohibitively expensive for education to be part of a civilized society? (Indistinguishable) I mean the fact that even children are being charged for education, it just blows my mind, in a Western society of all societies, right?
B: Absolutely and we do, you know, I am a product of…well half and half, I went to Catholic grade school and then a public high school and I got a wonderful education, a private college though obviously. Yeah, we’ve gotten off track in America, I don’t know enough to speak about education systems other places, I know a little bit about African education, especially in Rwanda and, you know, the decisions that are being made there are much more dire like I can afford to send one child to school obviously it will only be my boy, you know, like that’s a much more cut and dry system of injustice because here we still can (indistinguishable) in New York, you know, you can definitely get a good grade school, high school public education, but it’s turned for profit in a demoralizing, self-deceiving way, I mean I believe the children are our future, do you know?
M: Right, right, right.
B: All we should be doing is…and I am a daughter of a teacher like all we should be doing is supporting teachers, supporting education, getting more kids in the classroom, helping more kids fulfill their dream, but then I think that there’s something that will…I feel we’re at a tipping point and I may be overly optimistic, but at least the conversation now is so…like the cacophony is getting louder about the injustice of, you know, only a few being able to have a delightful education, you know, the social inequity which just perpetuates a socially unjust future. So, I want to pray that we are on the brink of rectification, you know?
M: Right, right.
B: I don’t know how we make, you know, I don’t know how we make it better except starting where we stand, but I have to hope we’re in that boat because it’s senseless.
M: Right, it doesn’t make sense not to, right?
B: No, no.
M: It is the future and I think what’s sad is there a realization and a rationalization that I’ve had to stapple with myself in that, you know, the Americans they talk about the next generation and the children are so important, everything’s about the children and yet they’re the first ones that penalize the children for wanting to get an education, I’m like, I just don’t get it…
B: Well, I think it’s an industrial age thing, you know, people see…people envision things like profit sectors so in the same way that prison has become an incredibly profitable industry I think they’ve decided and found a way to make education the same and it’s cruel and shortsighted, but it’s been so nice, you know, the last couple of weeks leaders of industry, you know, oh well heavens the last two years leaders of industry are having to step up in terms of climate change and roll back and whatever and say “oh no we’re gonna stick to the plan we were on”, but just in the last couple of weeks you’ve heard industry leaders say we’re gonna redefine success by, you know, giving back and including not just profit lines, so I just really do have the feel we’re in a moment to be aware enough about stuff to change it.
M: Right, right absolutely. So, moving on to some lighter questions cuz I know I’m going to run out of time, your team kind of said 30 minutes, but I do have some fun questions…
B: Oh it’s fine I’m off work. Yeah, okay great.
M: So, what’s your favorite book, fiction or non-fiction and what is it?
B: Oh my god, I mean, there have been many, but in the last few years it’s The Goldfinch. The Goldfinch just laid me flat like Donna Tartt just…she did such…she has done something language that…I never wanted it to end. I could have wrapped myself in those sentences like they were the warmest blankets it’s just…it was the most delightful second life I’ve had in I don’t know when.
M: Nice, fantastic. What do you most value in friends?
B: I most value kindness. Helpfulness is delightful also, like if they’re hilarious, what a boon, but I value a kind heart.
M: Fantastic. Good answer. What trait do you most deplore or dislike in yourself and in others?
B: I am most disappointed in myself when I like bark, that horrible little, when you snap at people and it’s just the sound of fear, right? You’re just like afraid of something or you’re ashamed of something and you’re lashing out to keep a distance, but I’ve…that’s something I’ve been working on lately is trying to just love myself through those moments. Oh honey whoa I’m sorry you’re ashamed of something or oh you think you have a zit or you’re not smart enough or whatever and it, you know, gently gets you back to being the human you want to be and likewise, especially in New York when someone barks at me I’m like oh bless them, or this is a bad moment for them, you know, like just knowing that we’re just not,
you know, yeah, I hate that but we’re just human beings, it’s just where we are in the moment and hopefully we all get better.
M: Oh, that’s funny. And then finally what do you consider is a most over rated virtue?
B: Over rated? Over rated virtue. Over rated virtue. Well, you know what comes to mind…and I just…maybe it’s not a…maybe it was never a virtue to begin with, but what I feel is a little over rated right now is self-promotion. People are very…there’s a certain like I don’t know…there’s a certain blind self-interest that I think every once in awhile could pause and listen a little as much as it looks at itself.
M: Right, fantastic, good answer. That has been such an interesting conversation. B: I know, I loved it, thanks so much, Moonah, what a joy!
M: Yeah that was really, really great.
B: And I will be seeing you at the…
M: …at the shoot.
B: Oh yeah at the shoot. Fantastic.
M: At the shoot and also at the Gala, we’re really, really excited and it’s gonna be absolutely fantastic. I know that your team has shared some really amazing things and issues and things that you’re settling with and making a difference with. So, I’m excited it’s gonna be really, really great fun to meet you and we’re looking forward to the shoot. So, have a fantastic weekend and thank you for taking the time.
B: Well, you too. My joy, thanks for asking great stuff and I look forward to meeting you.
M: You too. Take care, talk soon.
B: Bye.